My father has been in this country for approximately 40 years. As many of you know, he arrived here from India in the 1960’s to attend a graduate program at a large university. After completing graduate school, he took a job, and met my mother. They married, and life — as I know it — began to take shape.
My parents decided that my sister and I should be raised as “Americans”. That is, we would have some knowledge of our Indian background, but we’d live — for better or for worse — like any other American child would.
My ethnic background has made life very unusual at times, in particular when approaching matters of religion and dating/mating. But this blog entry isn’t about me, it’s about my father, so let’s say that from his perspective — having “lives” on two continents could be very difficult at times.
In India, we have relatives. I’d say “family”, but outside of a few people who I know somewhat well, most people are related only by blood. With few exceptions, most of my Indian relatives are getting up there in age.
It came to pass — or, should I say, as my father had begun to divulge details — around Thanksgiving 2003 — that there were problems on the Indian front. Without sharing details that I know my parents would disapprove of, my father had been forced to go to India to deal with some very, very bad people who had done some disgusting, and horribly dishonest things to his family. When I saw him over the Thanksgiving holidays, he was tired, and a bit haggard. He was very short on patience. I wasn’t sure what exactly had happened in India, but all I knew was that he’d have to return, probably within two months.
I’d begun to learn more details about the situation in India over the Christmas holidays. Between numerous frantic calls to his home from Indian relatives, to his explanation of the situation, I became aware that the situation was very complicated, and had affected many people. In America, these “evil-doers” would’ve been lead away in handcuffs, perhaps spending 10-15 years in prison. In India, these people were opportunistic, and understood how the “system” worked. They’d entreached themselves in this situation, and my father’s mission was to set things straight: Indian Style.
[ When I say "Indian Style", this is not a good thing. India moves very slowly. It's not unlike the Wild West in its legal implementations, and it's near impossible to get enforcement of the laws in a timely fashion. ]
I’d helped my father (by way of support and some chauffering) secure his plane ticket and other things that he’d need to head back to India. He’d left on January 7, 2004, and was expected to return last week. His birthday was two days ago, or yesterday, in EST.
[ Note that my father retired from his job of 34 years on 12/31/2003, and left for India a week afterwards. We'd been planning a party for February 2004. ]
Imagine my shock when I’d received a panicked phone call yesterday (at 12:36pm) from my mother that my father had become seriously ill, and was in a “Cardiac Care Center” in an undisclosed hospital in Poona, India. Apparently, he’d not been able to get out of bed for several days, and his “caretakers” (see also: “evil-doers”) had not been allowing him to take phone calls. The person who’d reported to my mother that my father was in the hospital hadn’t been able to tell her how it’d actually come to pass that my father ended up at the hospital. WHAT?!
It became more than a bit apparent, at this point, that I’d be heading out to India in the very near future. First, we weren’t sure what the exact medical condition of my father was. “Cardiac Care Center” doesn’t suggest that he was in the hospital for observation. Second, we weren’t sure of what exactly had transpired with the “evil-doers”, and unleashing their grasp from the situation in India.
As of this morning, we had more details. Apparently, my father had suffered congestive heart failure (MORE THAN THREE DAYS AGO), and had been taken to a hospital in Poona, India. As of this moment, his heart is operating at 20% capacity. We are still unclear who took him to the hospital, and under what pretenses. All we do know is that while his condition is currently stable, his condition is very serious.
My mother will be heading out to India next week. My aunt in India, a retired physician, has gone to Poona with her servant to arrange appropriate — and healthy — accomodations for my father. From what I understand, he is NOT to move or become excited for at least a month. And, in no uncertain terms, he is NOT to get on an airplane to return to America.
As for me, I’m currently arranging my passport and visa applications. It’s very likely that I’ll be headed to India by the end of the month. It remains unclear what the status of the “action items” are RE: “evil-doers”. I’m not sure if I’ll be going to India to help bring my father back to America, or if I’ll be helping sort out the remaining legal matters, before we all return to America.
So, I’m requesting prayers or “positive thoughts”, for my father’s well-being, if praying isn’t your type of thing. I’m not one to pray myself, and I’m also trying to stay focused on how I can best contribute to the situation. What actions can I do to try to sort things out in India? Would my best course of action be to go to India, and plan things once I get there? How best can I support my mother, seeing that we’ll be heading to India separately? Does my sister, who is currently on the left coast interviewing for post-residency positions, know everything that’s going on? Should I be meeting up with her and flying to India? How bad are things in India, really, given that it’s taken DAYS to hear of my father’s serious condition? I have all of these questions, and more.
Prayers and thoughts would be appreciated at this time. I’ll keep you posted.
